But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Drunk is not a location!
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
