Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
She bit a glass in half.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize