and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
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