I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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