I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
