I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
