your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
