This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
