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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried

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• (845): View more from New York

  what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.

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• (778): View more from British Columbia

  I wish life had little blips of pornography

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  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her

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• (214): View more from Texas

  For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.

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• (514): View more from Quebec

  theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero

  (514): View more from Quebec

  like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride

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  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

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• (207): View more from Maine

  Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing

  (206): View more from Washington

  and semen

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• (601): View more from Mississippi

  Did you feel uncomfortable?

  (1-601): View more from Mississippi

  For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.

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• (518): View more from New York

  I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.

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• (863): View more from Florida

  I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks

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