I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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