I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Randomize
