The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize