kristin has been a bad kristin
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
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