Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
