I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Randomize
