Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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