apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
