Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I think my nap took me to another dimension
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
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