This girl is more easily done than said...
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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