Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
