You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
