i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
