I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Randomize
