We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
