she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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