we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize