Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize