I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
