I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize
