So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
