I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
