He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize