Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
