thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize