Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
My hand turned me down
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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