bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
