We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
