I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
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It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
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I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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