Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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