The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
How naked do you want me to be?
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
