It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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