Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize