When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize