____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
