I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Randomize
