Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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