Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
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