I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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