Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Randomize