i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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