billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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